The night started like any other night out in a foreign city, your not really sure where to go or what places go off etc. We went to various different bars trying to find the one tht appealed to us most. We finally found it. It was a place called Factory. However when we were on our way we got harrased into going into a ping pong show with the promise of free entry with one drink purchaed. So this had us asking, hmmm, whats the catch? The catch was that a beer was 800baht which is about $25 we got up and walked out and were chased by to Thai guys begging us to stay asking "how much you want pay?" I said normal price for a beer 90baht is all we were going to pay. He says "nooooo i cant do 90baht, i do 90baht today you come tomorrow, close down" exactly like something out of Russell Peters
So i ended upagreeing to 300 baht which at $10 is an absolute steal considering what was to follow in the show.
So we sit down and it is apparent straight away that it is not seedy old men and perverts coming to see these show. The amount of females actually out numbered the guys and to my suprise their were quite a few elderly couples going in for the show, i'm talking 60+.
It starts off pretty slowly and were just like. hurry the fuck up and shoot ping pong balls at us already. The first lady on stage reaches into the holiest of holy's and starts to pull out a fluorescent string that is about 30 meters long, impressive but not that impressive. Any way shit escalates from there pretty fast and after everything you are left asking "shit what can possibly be next?" So im gonna get straight to the interesting part. This woman come out and starts pulling some string out and tied to the sting is a double edged razor blade like the old style blades that the barbers use. Then as she keeps pulling, another razor blade and another and another and another until she has pulled out 30 blades at least (i counted them). Me and my 2 mates were like impressive but they are probably not sharp. 2 seconds later she gets 3 drinking straws grabs the razor blades and starts slicing the straws like a chef chopping shallots! She did this with most of the blades to prove they were sharp. Impressive yes?
Nest lady walks out with a small bird cage and immediately everyones jaw in the bar that was already half open in shock of the previous act opened just that little bit further. After some moving around and a push none other than a budgie drops out into the cage and starts flying around in the cage. She shuts the cage and walks of stage to a loud applause. The next lady comes out and places a towell on top of the cage. She then stands over the cage and none other than a mouse drops out onto the towell.... Their were many more things like this with fish etc. but i dont have time to tell them all or it will be a 10000 word essay. Unfortunaltey it was no photography so i dont have any photos.
So now me and my two Norwegian mates that i have made (Stien and Oman) headed of to factory
From there the night consisted of Jagermiester and red bull pretty much every 5 minutes. Then it all becomes a little blury from there and i wont go into to many details but i will say that it was crazy.
Eventually i started to feel a little light headed and ill so we got a tuk tuk dropped the girls of at their hostel and went home, i was holding bsack vomit the whole trip whoch for anyone that knows me i just never spew from alcohol, no matter how much i drink. Havent since i was a teenager. So we get out of the tuk tuk and it is abundantly clear that this spew is coming weather i like it or not. Stians room is before mine so i wanted to make it past their so he didn't see me spew. Fail! I powerchucked right out the front of his in the garden, he asked if i was ok and i casually replied with "yeah i'm sweet" like nothing had ever happened. I start walking towards my room, power chuck again and continue walking towards my room but i power chuck again! Finally make it to my room and i get this horrible feeling in my guts, the one that says find a toilet and fast! Well i can let you use your imagination from there as to what happened. But instead i'm just going to tell you. I'm sitting on the toilet with pretty much water splattering the bowl from my bowels while leaning to the side and powerchucking into the shower at the same time. Would have been quite amusing for someone to watch. From then on it was all down hill, my whole body ached all over and this continued most of the day. I had fallen victim to the notorious Thai belly.
I am now starting to feel better but still a bit seedy. I took some gastro stop which i brought from home on mums recommendation and this has helped a lot as the same thing happened to Stian and he is sill crook. As always Mum came to the rescue when i was i'll with her good advice and she was 1000's of kilometers. Thanks Mum!
The knee is still sore but i am going to attempt to train tomorrow with it heavily strapped. Their is no chance i will be able to do the MMA class so i will try Muay Thai and if that doesn't work i should be able to do western boxing as my knee only hurts when i twist it or change direction suddenly. Due to the boredom and not being able to train i got a special Sak Yant tattoo on the base of my neck (im sorry mum, don't worry i got it so that i would be able to conceal it). It has magical healing powers and will hopefully help to heal my knee so i can start training again. It was performed in the traditional manner with a bamboo needle that they jab you with over and over and over again with. I could actually hear it piercing the skin and making a popping sound. It also hurts a lot more than a regular tattoo gun. When it i told him i wanted it done the traditional way with the bamboo needle the Thai Guy asked me several times, u sure, u sure? much much pain. In my true fashion i took it on and spent an hour and a bit in a fair bit of pain. To take my mind of it i just listened to the music they had cranking and thought about someone punching me in the head repeatedly which would hurt a lot less.
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